Looking for jobs!!!

I have been trying to find a job today. Ugh. It has been a difficult day. Now the internet isn't working so I can't looks for applications. My parents think that since I didn't want to go to school that that meant that I regret it. I don't. I tried it out and it's just not for me. Why is looking for a job so difficult. Like it's freaken ridiculous. I just want to work on my portfolio for my photography. But no keep liking for a job or you will be a bum. I am gosh darn it. No one will call. Me. And my parents tell me to not get frustrated but it's very frustrating. VERY!!! I want to work at charming Charlie's or something something like that. But no one is calling me. I need to just calm down and just give it to God. He will find me a job. If he thinks it's good for me he will will it for me. God is the almighty God. He is my savior and I love him. I maybe going through a rough time on finding a job but I need to just chill about it. I just want money. Oh man. The last two days I have been talking to a guy.  And he's in college right now. I don't know what my feelings are for him just yet. Like for the longest time I was like he is so disresctful. But now I'm just like, maybe k had just misjudged him. And maybe it was my feelings towards him and maybe I was afraid to get close. I don't know. Well all I know is a 2pm I get to go get coffee wh my best friend Sara sprinkle at the whistle stop at downtown Lee's summit. She always brings a smile to my face. I love her so much. She is such a dear to me. She is so kind. And I want to be like her sometimes. Because when I se ever love for Jesus all the time. And see the hope in her life. I just want to not have anything to worry about. She is actually going to medical school. She is so amazing. I think she is wanting to be a nurse or something. Sara has brought so much joy into my life. I know that she is a true friend because I know that she will never leave me and that she will not just stop being my friend because I have so much drama. She will love me and she is always praying for me. I love that about her. I love it when she has time to go get coffee and be able to talk like we haven't talked in forever. It's been about a week. I don't know my other friend is not who she said she is. She left me because she was tired of my drama. And that she doesn't want to be my friend be cause I'm not perfect and she thinks that she can do no wrong. And everything that I have done with our friendship is all my fault. She thinks she can control everyone's lives. If she doesn't like what we are doing she has change everything to do what she likes. She is the boss of everyone. And what she says what we have to do. She just stabbed me in the back. She dropped me like a sack of potatoes. That I don't matter and only the people that give her what she wants matters. If you don't give her something. She will just not be your friend. She is so fake. Pisses me off. With everything that we have gone through she's just done. In her words she's like well people change and they move on. We've been best friends for three years. You don't just give up on them because your tired of them. Like who does that. Only someone that is fake. She is so fake around me. Like tell me how you feel and grow up and don't do stuff over the Internet. If I posted something on the Internet then don't just turn around and do the same thing and block me and then just text me. Pick up your phone and call. I'm just so frustrated by all of this. Well now I know how she is and that once you are doing ok and have taken my happiness it's ok to just drop me. That's who she is. But I may not have her but I have God no matter what. He is here for me and is not going to just give up on me because he says that I have too much drama. No because he's not like that only people that don't have God is like that.